真多人啊~~~~你的语法错了很多哦 ......过去式要加紧练习啊,固定的短语搭配记牢哦~~~~~

你后面可以不用介绍自己，留一个疑问给读者，让他们猜测讲的是谁！！！！~~~~~

格式有问题、错误太多，要修改重写。

格式有问题、错误太多，要修改重写。中间有些部分语法错误

我们叫个朋友吧！呵呵

你要多多努力呀!@_@

我简单改了下。
Look at the mirror, there is a girl in it. She has short hair, big eyes and a long face. She is now studying in Minan Middle School. Her favorite subject is history, because she thinks history （学科不加THE）is very interesting. She was born in (过去式）1996-4-14. So she is going to be 14 years old. 　
She has many hobbies, such as（for example加句子such as+动ING） playing ping-pong, playing computer games, collecting things, playing chess and so on. She can play basketball., but she can’t play it very well.So She wants some one teaches help her about basketball.(此句没看懂） Oh!Who can help her with basketball! 　(help sb with sth,固定搭配)
Do you know what’s her favorite animal?Don’t know? Let me tell you!Hu-Hu!She doesn’t like any animals.Because she thinks animals（表整体不加the) are very fearful! Oh! Is the girl as timid as a mouse? 　

指导一下,谢谢咯*_*