Get the 4113. You know that guy in class with the blank look—the one who’s always asking, “Um, what are we supposed to be doing?” Don’t be him. Instead, be the one with the answers. Find out ahead of time whether that essay should be typed, exactly what you’ll need for the camping trip, and which math problems your teacher wants finished by noon. When you’re fuzzy4 on the details or your teacher’s expectations, any moment can turn into a crisis... so stay serene5 and in control by being prepared!
Show off your style. Ever notice how some clothes just make you feel more like yourself... while others never feel quite right? Maybe you feel shinier when wearing sparkly earrings, or more in charge sporting boots that make a satisfying stomp. Whatever your unique style, wear at least one item each day that makes you feel wonderful.
Follow through6. The concept is simple: if you commit to something, do it. But sometimes it gets a little tougher than that. What if a friend asks you to do something, but for some reason you don’t think you’ll be able to come through? Be honest with him. Saying no to a friend is never easy, but it’s better than making promises you can’t keep. By the way, following through is even more important if the person you made a promise to is you.
Develop you talents. Everyone is good at something... what’s your special talent? Maybe it’s fixing things, or designing awesome outfits, or working on puzzles. Make time each week for one of your talents. It’ll be worth it to hear yourself play a song on the guitar or feel the thrill of placing first at a swim meet. And the best part of all is that as you sharpen your skills, your confidence will grow, too.
Be an optimist. If your best friend says she’ll give you a call after gymnastics7 but then doesn’t, you might:
a) wonder why she’s mad at you.
b) figure she’s probably just exhausted after all those back-handsprings.
If you picked b, congratulations! You’re an optimist—someone who tends to look on the bright side instead of assuming the worst. Negative thinking can sap8 your confidence by making you doubt everything—your friends, your family, even yourself! If you find your outlook clouding over9, ask yourself if there’s any real evidence that something is wrong. Is there any reason you shouldn’t assume the best? Even if the answer turns out to be yes (and it rarely will!), you’re more likely to solve problems successfully with a positive attitude.
Plug yourself into a cause. Find your higher purpose: Join forces with a group or organization dedicated to something you believe in. Whether you’re volunteering at an animal shelter, teaching kids to read, or walking to raise money for medical cures, the strength of your beliefs will make you light up with confidence. So will learning new skills and working with new people—all while making a difference you can be proud of!
Think before you speak. Sometimes it’s hard to resist acting on impulse—it’s almost like trying not to scratch an itch! But letting your gut10 reactions rule you can be like having a three-year-old in your head making your decisions. How to get back in control? Slow down. The next time you feel that powerful urge to say or do something you’re not sure is smart, take a few moments of silence (or slowly count to 10). Then choose your words calmly and carefully.
Surround yourself with allies. Have you ever had a friend who made you see yourself in a whole new light? Maybe you acted bolder and wittier around him... or maybe he made you feel nervous and unsure. Either way, the people you let into your life are bound to11 influence you—they can sink you with their doubt or lift you up with their support. So hang out with friends who admire you as much as you admire them. Surround yourself with supporters!
Fake it. Yes, you read that right. No matter how self-assured12 you become, no human being feels confident all the time. We’re bound to face moments—days, even—when we look in the mirror and all we see is a zit13 the size of California. Actually, those are the times when it’s most important to walk tall14 and keep your chin up15. Remind yourself that it’s normal to have some low moods. They’re just moods... and they pass (thank goodness!). So take a deep breath and... Onward!
When you first start building up your confidence, it might feel like you’re faking it all the time, but that’s only natural. There’s even an expression for it: “Fake it till you make it.” The amazing truth is that acting confident can make you feel confident—and so can the reactions you get from other people. So even if you are faking it at first, you’ll soon inspire yourself to the real thing. One day you’ll wake up and realize that little by little, you’ve developed real self-confidence. You’ve turned into that girl who’s unshakeable and unstoppable. So hey, confident you! How does it feel?!
有备而来。你知道班上那个一脸茫然的家伙——他总是问：“呃，我们该做些什么呢？”不要成为他那样的人。相反，做一个胸有成竹的人。提前弄清楚那篇短文是否应该打印出来；你需要为野营准备什么；以及老师想要你们在中午之前完成哪些数学题。当你对这些细节或老师的期望懵懵懂懂时，每时每刻都可能演变成一场麻烦……所以，准备充分就可保持平常之心、掌握主动权。
展示个性。你是否注意到有些衣服更适合你，有些衣服穿上去总感到不大对劲儿？也许你戴着闪亮的耳饰感觉更加光彩照人，也许你穿着运动靴重重踏下才觉得更胜券在握。无论你有哪种独具一格的风格，每天至少戴一件让你感觉心情大好的饰物。
说到做到。这个概念简单明了：如果你答应做某事，就一定要做到。但有时真做起来会有些棘手。如果一位朋友要你做某事，而你出于某种原因认为自己不能做，怎么办？对他实话实说。对朋友说“不”不容易，但它总强过许下无法兑现的承诺。顺便说一句，如果你承诺的对象是你自己，那么说到做到就更加重要了。
发掘潜能。每个人都有所擅长……你的特殊才能是什么？也许是修理东西，或设计精美的服装，或猜谜语。每周抽时间发掘一下你的才能。聆听自己在吉他上弹奏歌曲或感受自己在游泳大赛上折桂的兴奋之情，这都很值得一做。其中最妙之处在于：随着你的技能日益提高，你的信心也与日俱增。
做个乐天派。如果你最要好的朋友说她做完体操后会给你打电话，可却没打，你会：
a) 疑心她在生你的气；
b) 觉得她可能只是做完后手翻后太累了。
如果你选择了b，恭喜你！你是个乐天派——你通常会看到事物光明的一面而不会朝最坏的方面打算。消极的想法会让你怀疑一切——朋友、家人、甚至你自己，从而将你的信心消耗殆尽！如果你发现你的想法变得阴暗，就问问自己是否真有什么事出了问题。有理由让你不朝最好的方面去想问题吗？即使答案是肯定的（这种情况微乎其微！），你用乐观的态度也更有助于顺利地解决问题。
投身于某项事业。寻求更高的目标：参加到团体或组织中去，共同致力于追求你所信仰的事业。无论你是在动物收养所做自愿者，还是教小孩子读书识字，还是为医疗救助奔走募资，信仰的力量将点燃你的自信。学习新技能、与新结识的人合作——这一切让你拥有一个你为之自豪的人生的同时，也让你更加自信。
三思而行。有时候真的很难控制住冲动——这就像忍着不去挠痒！但是让你的本能反应支配你，就像让一个3岁的小孩在替你作决定。如何恢复自控力呢？慢慢来。下次当你感到忍不住要说或做你不确定是否明智的事时，先沉默一会儿（或慢慢从1数到10），然后再理智谨慎地选择你的措辞。
与你的支持者为伍。你有过这样的朋友吗？他能让你以全新的眼光看待你自己；也许有他在身边，你的行为会更加大胆机智……也许他让你感到紧张、毫无自信。不管怎样，你允许走进你生活的人一定会影响你——他们的怀疑能让你一蹶不振，他们的支持能让你兴致高昂。所以要与那些你欣赏他们、他们也同样欣赏你的朋友交往。与你的支持者为伍！
佯装自信。是的，你没念错。不管你多有自信，没人会自始至终感到信心十足。我们一定会面临这样的时刻——甚至数天——当照镜子时，看到的只是一个像加州那么大的青春痘。其实这样的时刻，挺直腰杆、毫不气馁才至关重要。提醒自己，情绪低落再正常不过。它们只是一些情绪……最终会过去（谢天谢地！）。所以深呼吸，然后……继续前行！
当你刚开始建立自信时，你可能感觉你总是在装模作样，这很正常。甚至有这样的说法：“假装成功，直到真正成功。”一个令人惊讶的事实是：表现得自信能让你感觉自信——而且别人对此的反应也会让你感觉自信。所以，即使刚开始你只是假装自信，你也很快会激励自己变得真正自信。总有一天你会醒悟，意识到自己已经一点点地培养出真正的自信。你已经成为那位坚定不移、势不可挡的女孩。所以，嗨，自信的你，感觉如何？！
1. glide [glaid] v. 滑过
2. building block 积木
3. get the 411=get the information，网络未普及之前，美国人拨打411来获得日常所需要的信息。
4. fuzzy adj. 模糊的，不清楚的
5. serene adj. 平静的
6. follow through 坚持到底
7. gymnastics n. 体操
8. sap v. 逐渐侵蚀
9. cloud over 变阴，云层密布
10. gut adj. 本能的
11. be bound to 一定
12. self-assured 有自信的
13. zit [zit] n. 青春痘
14. walk tall 挺直腰杆
15. keep one’s chin up 不气馁